E-Di {the Quantum Singularity}

E-Di, was, and still is, a lot of things to me.  He was a best friend, a goof ball, a small heavy blanket, a frustration, he was the silliest cat I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.  He would chase after toys like a dog (and yes, would bring them back to us in his mouth and drop it with that look like “you’re going to come pick this up and throw it again right?” no matter where he decided to drop it).  He moved his tail like a feverish squirrel and was always making so much damn noise (so much so that when he first moved in, we couldn’t figure out why he wouldn’t stop meowing, but we quickly realized that he just loved talking).

When we lost our little monster on October 13th, we knew that we would have a void in our lives.  E-Di was one of those kitties that insisted on following you everywhere.  No matter where you went in the house, you were tripping over an E-Di.  Late at night, he would love to sleep on your feet and he never had any qualms about you moving him about while he was sleeping.  As long as he was still with you, he was as happy as can be.

He was part of our lives, and the house is just so empty and quiet without him.  Even Dante notices.  It breaks my heart every time Dante jumps out of a room or around a corner, expecting E-Di to be waiting for him, to pounce and run and play.  Dante spends much more time around us now, and is a lot more hyper.  I guess E-Di was really keeping Dante in check all this time, and not the other way around like we always joked.

I just can’t stop thinking about how little E-Di deserved the pain he endured.  He had all the love to give, even if the love was in the form of licks and bites.  We wanted to bring E-Di into a big city, where he could look out at the hustle and bustle of busy streets and strange smells.  He would have loved having a beautiful view, instead of our grungy view of parking lots.

I know there will be people to read this and consider E-Di to be like any other cat, or to mean little more to us than what most people consider to be pets.  But E-Di wasn’t just a cat, or a pet.  He had his own unique personality, his own preferences, his favourite things, and things he hated.  I upsets to acknowledge that every cat is an E-Di or a Dante, they are all unique little creatures, well aware of those around them, and the capacity to have emotion.  Every stray cat that we befriend, we are simply trying to give them a little bit of comfort.  So many people ignore them, see them as problems or nuisances, and so few see them as anything that is alive.  I bothers me that I could never communicate with E-Di, to tell him how much he meant to me, and that we were trying our best to relieve him of the pain. The thought that E-Di was confused and afraid at the end brings me to tears.

It took me a long time to be able to write this post about E-Di.  I have had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that no matter what I do, I will only visit E-Di in my dreams and memories.  No matter how difficult it is, we need to keep moving forward.  We need to take this tragedy in our lives and funnel it into energy to make our lives better, reach our goals, and make new ones.  E-Di would have never wanted us to become sad sacks, he hated when we were on the computer past 9:30am, and never let us sleep in past 8:30am.  There are so many things I want to say about E-Di, or about the things I have thought about since, but I won’t.  For now, my energy will be put towards other things, and my thoughts of E-Di, life and death, will be contained to my private work.

My partner, who also wrote a post about E-Di (if interested click here), I feels ended it the best and I simply can’t say it better than this:

“My only hope is that billions of years from now, when I’ve become cosmic dust, my ions join with his forming a new star, and that we may be together forever.”

I promise I will carry you in me until the end, in unison.

Your Desperate Friend.

Dante vs. the Kraken of Garbage Island!

So, I have been trying more sequential story telling in my art lately.  I have been expanding and working on “Dante” as a character, and the universe he exists in for possibly years now, but I always had trouble actually creating a story out of it.  I have to give credit for the original inspiration of this story to my partner Korpolfr and our friend Greg.  They came up with the title and I asked if I could take it and run with it into a full little comic.  I am going to try to post one page a week, hopefully this really pushes me to continue working on it.  Thanks for reading,

xoxo

About Watching the Grass Grow.

Almost a week ago now, my partner Korpolfr and I had the extreme enjoyment of being able to see a real legend give a motivational talk: Henry Rollins.  Over the past few months, a lot of things have changed.  I never expected to be working a near full time job (and two jobs at that!), it seriously cuts into my art time.  We never made back plans for too many things, and too many of things have happened.  But, seeing Henry Rollins I think was very healthy for both of us.  He is a fantastic speaker, and I recommend anyone to see if they have the opportunity.  The main themes or ideas that I walked away from that with was to not sit by and watch the grass grow.  Get out of your house, connect to other people, take risks, see the world.  This is how we have been trying to arrange our lives since Korpolfr went into summer break from school.  We have been exploring London’s urban forests and parks, biking more often, walking by the river at night to see the stars better, and generally just getting out more.  We biked out to a great look out spot to watch the transit of Venus.  We have been gardening like crazy, with plants multiplying all over the place.  My herbs are growing really well, and I think I could even harvest some of the Thyme soon.  I can’t wait to make fresh pesto!  We have also been a lot more social lately, it really pushes me to cook more healthy foods and more foods from scratch in order to be a little thrifty.  I’ve made this cake two times now and it is delicious, it is a house-warming gift for our friend tonight!  Any way, so this is why I haven’t made a whole lot of time for blogging.. I’ve simply been really busy doing so much other stuff.  But I am going to try to make more consistent updates from now on.  I have an exciting new on-going narrative project that I will be posting about sometime this week.  Live life, because this is it.  Enjoy this gallery of photos, until next time!

(Song lyrics from La Dispute – Safer In The Forest/Love Song For Poor Michigan off of their album Wildlife)

xoxo

Shock Stock {day three}

It honestly is hard to believe that Shock Stock took place over a month ago now.. my how time flies!  This also reminds me of how I need to drastically re-adjust my time schedules, and personal expectations.  Between working more hours at Michaels, and my partner being out of school… I am not getting done as much as I would like.  I am still getting a lot of progress done on the house, and we have been doing a lot of gardening together (post coming soon).

But, of course, this is my thrilling conclusion to one of the most exciting weekends I have had in my entire life: Shock Stock 2012.

Last we left off, my partner and I were crawling into bed waaaaay too late, with only a few hours until we were to be back at the best Horror expo around.  After about an hour of sleep, we were off again for another exciting day.  Luckily, we weren’t the only ones rubbing our eyes and giving slanty, groggy smiles on Sunday morning.  But it made for a really relaxed and casual day.  Also, half of the money made from ticket sales this day was donated to charity.  I noticed a lot more kids roaming around this day too, and they were dressed to impress:

These two little girls both had horror themed patches sewn on their jackets. Too cute!

I got a lot of one of a time experiences on Sunday, including getting picked up by the neck by Kane Hodder (aka: Jason), getting to say the line “Yes sir, fuck you sir” to Joe Pilato (Day of the Dead) on camera with Kari, and possibly being molested by Sal Lizard (Vampire Santa).

Kane Hodder was a blast to be around!

Kari and I after our break out performance together.

Fred (the Hammer) Williamson!

We frequently went over to Sin Labs area to play with their zapper.

Me with Joanna Angel (and the cum flag).

I helped hang that flag up two out of three days, and found out Sunday night that the flag was used in multiple pornos, and the white stains all over it were real.  Fun!

Paper lantern that was signed by every guest, was set off after Shock Stock ended.

Oh hello Joanna, say what you are short like me? Hell yeah.

After all the guests left, and the chairs were stacked (although not child proof), we helped Grim Brother Jake drag a whole lot of stuff back to his house where we were rewarded with pizza and freshly baked cookies (thanks Tina!).  But really, this weekend was so amazing and I am so thankful that we were part of it.  All of the pictures, from all three days are available exclusively on my facebook page here.

Shock Stock 2013… can’t wait!!

Thanks for reading, as this is the final Shock Stock 2012 post, you can look forward to my regular postings next!

xoxo

It’s Time to Live {Spring planting and nice weather}

This past weekend, it suddenly became Spring and we were both ready for it.  On Saturday we got the supplies we needed and on Sunday we spent the entire day planting and transplanting.  Our plants were far too crowded in their pots, having grown some over the winter.  We still need a large pot for our elephant ear plant, but for now it is scattered all over our house in smaller pots.  We quite literally have plants in every room of the house now (except the bathroom, but that will be changing soon too!).  It is so nice to wake up in the morning to bright green plants growing by your head.

Without further adieu:

Jerry working hard in the back yard.

The very welcoming entrance to our humble abode.

While Jerry was mostly working at transplanting and doing doctor with them, I got the joy of finding dog poo in our front garden.  I admit, we always neglect the front  sectioned off bit of dirt garden.  My first year here, my mom planted Hostas there, but since I never watered them they died rather quickly (unfortunately this is a less than ideal place for a garden, since it does not get a lot of sun or rain (under the roof over hang).  This year, I decided to try an assortment of wild flowers that were suited to less sun.  Hopefully they sprout up (although this morning I noticed a very light frost on things…. fuck).  I think I will throw some more seeds down in a week or so just in case.

These plants are in the front kitchen window.

This baby pot has some dwarf marigold seeds in it.

We found this cool glass planter at a thrift store, and knew it would be perfect for our ever lasting ever green plant. The photo really doesn’t do it justice.

More plants, at our back door.

Another thrifted planter I found. I know that the image has sun damage, but I like how muted the colours are. Plus I love robins!

I failed to take photos of the plants now residing in the bedroom… but when I have another plant update (and I will!) I will be sure to include them.  I also didn’t take photos of the back garden area.  Jerry spent a lot of time edging the concrete pad and sweeping the area.  He planted some peas in one part of the garden, and I planted sunflowers in the other.  I also planted some mystery flower seeds in a hanging basket and in the robin planter.. I hope something grows from them! We moved the plant stand out of the kitchen, which also freed up some more floor space and makes the room feel less cluttered.  One step closer to the kitchen being “decorated”!

After all the work we did, it felt great to relax outside.  We let the kitties out to enjoy the weather too and explore a bit.  They love being outside, but are generally too timid to go outside of our back patio area.

Spring was moving in the air above
And in the earth below and around him,
Penetrating even his small dark and lowly little house
With its spirit of divine discontent and longing.
It was small wonder, then,
That he suddenly flung down his brush on the floor
And said, “Bother!”
Something up above was calling him.

(Segment from La Dispute’s song Seven)

xoxo

Dance Out Transformers! {quick update and photograph}

I am *insanely* busy this week.. partially due to my poor planning.  How does the Holiday season always just jump onto my lap?  Although it doesn’t really help that my family decided to have Christmas early this year, pushing a lot of deadlines weeks ahead.  I have a very special commission to have finished for the weekend, plus a bunch of food and gifts.  I will have more updates about my projects next week, in the mean time enjoy this fun photo I took of a Mini-Con a while ago:

He's a dance machine! (Pun totally intended)

By the way, do you remember that blog contest I posted a few weeks ago here? Well, I won!  I am very excited to be receiving that beautiful art doll.  It is going to motivate me to start my art wall gallery that I have prepped and sitting in a pile.  I will make a full post about this once I get the doll in the mail!   (and yeah, I know, I have great luck in draws)

xoxo

{I hold you sweetly in my head} : La Dispute live

This past Tuesday, I had the joy of seeing one of my all-time-favourite bands, La Dispute (anyone who knows me, knows how hard I fell for this band as soon as I started listening to them).  They played at the London Music Hall, and for only $12, there was no way I was going to miss this show.

the only picture I took that night

Despite being surrounded by high school girls (they surely do not fully appreciate the depth of La Dispute’s music and lyrical mastery I bitterly thought, but to be fair I once was a high school who also thought I understood love and loss too), but it was amazing.  I only wish they had played Last Lost Continent, which the crowd pleaded for at the end of the set.  They did come back for an encore, and apologized for not playing Last Lost Continent due to the fact that it frequently becomes a 45 minute long song live.. personally I would have loved for them to only play that song, the entire time.  It is by far my favourite song by them (and clearly a song loved by many others in the crowd).  I actually didn’t take any pictures during the show, I’m happy that my partner did get a couple.  The crowd was fairly rough (although pretty tame in comparison to other shows we’ve been to), and since we weren’t right in the front, it made taking photos more work than it was worth.  Plus, I think have a rather different view of the necessity of photographs to remember an event, and would rather enjoy shows in the moment, instead of worrying about breaking my camera/ getting a good shot.

photo taken by Korpolfr

photo taken by Korpolfr

photo taken by Korpolfr

One of the girls that was in front of me posted two videos from the night also (I assume it was the one girl in front of me, I saw that she had a camera throughout the show and the angle and view of the show makes perfect sense).  I was happy that this was posted, because the Castle Builders was definitely a highlight of the show for me.

(although the audio quality is terrible, I love seeing and snippets of shows that I attended on youtube later).